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Keith Pratt
FIRE ENGINES were called to Buckingham Palace last night after the Queen of England set fire to the curtains on her four-poster bed.

The blaze was swiftly brought under control and no one was hurt, although her majesty and two friends, Queen Julianna of the Netherlands and Queen Noor of Belgium, were treated for smoke inhalation at the scene.

According to reports, the three monarchs had been having a sleepover when the incident happened. It is believed that the curtains caught fire when the Queen lit one of her farts with a match. The flames quickly spread to the canopy over the bed and the Queens were forced to take refuge on the balcony in their pyjamas.

A palace insider told reporters: "Their Royal Highnesses had been making a lot of noise all evening. Their giggling and shrieks of raucous laughter were keeping everyone awake. In fact, the footman had already had to go in two or three times to tell them to go to sleep at the time the blaze happened."

The Queen later apologised for the trouble she'd caused, and praised firemen for their swift action. Reading from a prepared statement, she said: "I now realise that lighting my fart was a silly thing to do. It is only thanks to the quick-thinking and bravery of the emergency services that the consequences were not far worse."

This was the first time the Queen had had a sleepover since she was forbidden from holding them by her late mother. The last time the three European monarchs got together for a sleepover was at Windsor Castle in November 1992, when the resulting blaze caused damage estimated at over forty million pounds.


Queen: Lit one of her farts
BGv2.0
OFF WITH HIS HEAD!!!!!
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